|
NEWEST ************************** Tuesday, Dec. 07, 2004 - 2:10 a.m. ************************** "There are things in this world that make me cry;" "There are things in my head I dare not touch;" "There are reasons why I don’t;" "There are too many questions;" "There are not enough answers;" "There are never enough answers;" "These are just words;" "They
are here for you..."
Newest 5 Entries: My Suicide... (Updated) - Sunday, Jun. 17, 2007 |
QUOTES FOR THE DAY:
"Love
hurts, but friendship hurts more when lost through love...." "They
say that if you love someone you should let them go, but they never say what to
do when they don't come back." ***************************************************************
[Usher intro:] *************************************************************** The rain is falling heavily outside and once again I am feeling in an introspective mood. I love the rain and I went outside and stood for a little while letting it fall over me….reminiscing…thinking....wondering. It is remarkable how someone enters our lives and makes such a huge impact upon us that they forever change who we are. She seems to blow into your life at a time when you need her the most. She brings with her fresh ideas, thoughts and undiscovered dreams. Your way of thinking is slightly altered because of the things she seemingly brings with her. It is as if she opens your soul with her fingertips and breathes life into it. The warm soft air that she breathes scatters the butterflies that reside deep within the soul. The butterflies are released and the sky is full of an array of different colours. Brilliant, awe-inspiring colours. The beauty of them is unlike anything you have ever seen in your life. She also brings with her a newfound level of love, acceptance and respect for who you are. It is unbelievable how she can make your spirits soar and let your heart fly free. There are no boundaries or inhibitions which would block the ecstasy that she gives to you. Thoughts of her make you feel alive inside. The thoughts release all of the things that may hamper your mood, and make you just want to scream with joy. Even the rain that dampens the ground outside cannot erase the happiness that this person gives to you. If anything, the rain makes you want to kick off your shoes and splash through the deepest and dirtiest mud puddles. There may be a time that she or you decide that it's time to part. The parting of two souls is always painful. You feel so damn miserable and feel as though those beautiful, colourful butterflies have turned to grey. They feel as they lie dormant in your soul, unable to move or breathe. B ut you know what?Even though she may be gone, you still have the memories of things shared and secrets divulged. Once the pain heals, you realize that although their physical being may be gone, you are left with so many new and wondrous things. I miss LC sometimes. More than I care to admit, even to myself. I know she doesn’t think of me anymore, or cares, but sometimes I really do miss her a lot. We don’t speak anymore, even though we live on the same side of town, nor do I even know how she is, what she is doing or what she thinks of me. It does matter to me, because I would like to know, but she left me with many gifts. She taught me to embrace my inner child and never release it. She taught me how to laugh at myself and at life. She taught me to accept myself and love the person that I have become. She taught me, more than I realized, more than she realized, that it is the inner heart and soul which is the most important part of someone. That woman loved me when I was in pain both mentally and physically. She loved me when I thought that my knees were never going to heal and I was walking around on crutches. She loved me while I was crying. She loved me when I looked my worst and when I looked my best. I thank her for all of that and more. She made a huge difference in my life and in the way that I see things. I was just thinking about her. It must be the rain falling that prompted my thinking. I actually think about her quite a bit, but the romantic feelings have dissipated. The love is still there. I
think it will always be there.
The damned soul springs eternal. Your soul is the
The truth of what is, and what is to
You see things in black and white and
You may have once been considered one
Left alone, and lost a love perhaps.
You seek
Open your eyes and let some light in.
|